Clingy, Grabby, Desperate People

I've observed it in my own sad behavior and I believe it applies to a lot of people. The fact is, people are fucking clingy. We're convinced that we need others to feel good. Whether it's about our appearance, sexuality, or general nature, we depend on others in order to like ourselves and to affirm our identities.

Many people don't feel complete without constant romantic attention. That attention is addicting since it seems good natured until that attention drifts to another and you're left alone. It's the absence of attention that makes people so desperate and sad after the one person they like - ends up liking another. It sucks when they're the only person you think about, yet they don't feel the same. Sure they like you, but liking you just isn't enough. They need others and they have their eyes wide open - scanning for someone better, someone un

like you.

Love makes everyone a little crazy. I'm wondering if it's possible to have some cont

rol over the future of a relationship. I guess that's what a lot of people wonder when they cling to the person they love - they're confused, unsure if they should hold on and wait for it to be perfect or left go and lose all those cheesy-romantic-flowery-butterfly-u

nicorn feelings.

And what about those warning signs? The ones that tell you not to fall for someone? It's scary to put your heart on the line after being broken once by the horrible absence of romantic affection. Where does one find the guts to crawl out from under their protective rock in order to find someone new? The scarier part is the possibility of being unable to find confidence and happiness within. I had it for awhile, but I can feel myself clinging onto others once again. Does that mean I'm "scared of commitment" like the cliche goes...?

I would sure love to find a guy to go crazy for again, but the thing is, I'm caught between wanting another relationship and finding happiness in the single life. Now that the possibility of a relationship is only weeks away - I'm terrified that I'll lose all my progress and I'll once again become a clingy, grabby, desperate jackass. The main question in my mind is: Is it worth it? My fluttery-fantastic emotions tell me yes, it is very much worth it. But, you guessed it...like a perpetually flipping coin, this problem has two sides and my reason tells me to be cautious - to the drastic point of staying single.

Love is simple.

Everybody uses somebody at one point or another. Eventually that person finds out and their heart is broken.

See. Love is simple. Either you both love each other equally or not at all.

I'd have to say that I've loved someone that I lost as soon as I decided to go away. You know that cliche saying: if you love someone, let them go? Well it proves to be true time and time again. If you're not going to let me grow, live my own life, then I'm not coming back; You never had me. But if you support the person you love and let them fly on their own, make their own mistakes, they'll fly back to you each and everyday because they find comfort in the arms that hold them - not constraint.

Throughout this mess, (an over dramatized mess at that) I've learned more about who I am and who I want to be by being told who I should be. In a relationship, there is a need for compromise. If your partner likes action movies and you just LOVE classics, suck it up and watch some mindless violence. But when you constantly feel the need to defend your actions and define yourself to the person that should love you, then compromise is out of the question. The single life is calling for you. It is a time to enjoy yourself because you are lovely and you should be able to love yourself in the simplest moments.